خیلی‌ عجیب مثل پیچک

تا حالا شده یه چیزیو بخواین بعد یکی‌ دیگه  دقیقا همونو خیلی‌ راحت‌تر و زود تراز شما اونو به دست بیاره،حتی بدون اینکه بخواد اون چیز‌رو....مساله تون همینه.از وقتی‌ یادم میاد من همینجوری بودم.هرچیو می‌خواستم دیگران زودتر از من داشتن...جالبه نه...قبلنا که خیلی‌ خوب بودم اصلا برام مهم نبود...الان نه....چند سالی‌ هست که تبدیل شدم به جادوگر سپید برفی....ته دلم سیاهه....حسودم....به همه کس حسودی می‌کنم...حتی خواهرم....من اینجوری نبودم.....اینجوری شدم....از وقتی‌ اینجوری شدم که هیچ چیز به کامم نبود...از همین ۴ سال گذشته شروع شد ...وقتی‌ که همه حتی اون داشتن میرفتن بالا...و دقیقا من موندم پائین....من....تنها....تنها....از همینجا من حسود شدم....شروع شده بود ....خیلی‌ عجیب مثل پیچک دوره من چرخیده...داره رشد می‌کنه....تا حالا چند دفعه یواش یواش ساقه هاشو زدم....تا میام برسم به ریشش....دوباره محکمتر می‌شه....داره منو فشار میده....له‌ میشم آخرش....له‌ داغون.....

تولدم مبارک

ویک سال گذشت از تولدم تو مالزی....می‌خوام بیام اینجا دوباره بنویسم واسه خودم فقط،شاید انگلیسی شاید فارسی نمیدونم....خیلی‌ ناراحتم از خودم از شرایط .....از همچی‌.....شاید دیگه وقتشه از گذشته که مثل چرخ وفلک تو سرم می‌چرخه بیام بیرون......یجورایی خسته شدم.....باید درست بشم .نه؟؟؟؟؟

امشب اولین شبی بود بعد از ۴ سال که تولدمو تنها نبودیم......خوشحاال بودم که امسال همه بودن.....
ناراحت بودم که چرا نمیتونم از لحظهٔ حالا لذت ببرم و همش ناراحتم و نگرانم....

غزاله بیا خوب باش.....بیا از فردا که یه ساله جدیده واست خیلی‌ خوب باش.....بیا قدر چیزایی که داری بدون...انقد با خودت قهر نباش.....تو خوبی‌......اشتباه زیاد داشتی ولی‌ اشکال نداره همه اشتباه می‌کنن.....از این به بعد خوب باش......
غزاله با خدا آشتی‌ کن...قهر بسه....

تولد مبارک دیوونهٔ بهمنی

Miss Every Second Of Malaysia

It's been seven month that we've backed home..... This 4 crazy years all I just wanted was to come back home again... Here we are...home....Iran... Not as home sweet home as I thought...not any more. I really miss every second of our simple, tired less and loneliness time... that's too bad that I really don't know what I really want,and what to do .... I just can't decide...Now I'm with my mom,dad,sis and grandma but there is something that I just can't understand.... WHY I AM NOT HAPPY,WHY I MISS MALAYSIA,WHY I INSIST TO GO BACK THERE AGAIN... WHY????????????????????? nothing is going good here for us,nothing... Hope for happier days.......

Count Down

well well well..

My first day in Malaysia was just a different day in whole my life.Since that day,I always had a dream to come back home,and never be here again....

My dream will come true finally,in the middle of April 2012.yes!
This is just a reminder note for myself.....
I do have lots of fun and good memories here but there is a hole in my heart which it will never heal....

I know I've gained a lot,but I cannot forget everything...
I am going back with big smile and full of hopes and I will try not to think about my failures here.
so,my count down is start.

Hard Chocolate Plan

Since I have came back in Malaysia,I have decided to make a huge step in my diet.
I have an endless hunger for sweets and chocolates every minutes of a day...it is not good at all.
so I've tried to manage my hunger and make my chocolaty mind to think about something else instead of sweetness.THIS IS REALLY HARD.

The best plan is not to quite chocolate all of a sudden,so have done it gradually.

Last week I bough to packs of my Lovely Kitkat just beacuase of 2 beautiful red mugs which they were free,so there would be no reason for this week to buy another pack...

I have to learn eat chocolate moderately.That is the best way to not get to fat.

Hello 28!

Happy Birthay !
last night was my Bd,I am turning to 28 years old, unbelievable !!!!!
this is just the new page of my life for sure....
but still not happy at all....
Since last night I've decided to be a better and a little bit different person in my life...
A person who cares more and wastes time less than before...
Love my life more...and stop being angry with all past years...I cannot fix them...

so Happy Bd dear ghazale,enjoye your life and accept life's gifts ....

I will ease your Mind

This is going to be new start for me and  I will do it........

Maybe I am not very into writing but now in this time I just want to start again.

recently I have made a folder which I named it My LOvely Blogs.Threre are 10 or 12 lovely blogs that I really love  to read  them everyday.

One of these blogs is Happy Place .This blog makes me calm,specially the latest post with this beautiful poem.

Sail on Silver Girl
Sail on by
Your time has come to shine
All your dreams are on their way

See how they shine
If you need a friend
I’m sailing right behind
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind 
–Simon and Garfunkel
you know which part is my favorite?
ohhhhhh I love this part ,mabye I 'll write it down and stick it on my refrigerator

Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind